Broken

I have now experienced my fourth pregnancy and loss in just over 2 years of marriage and every bit as heart breaking as the past 3. Even though I only made it to 8 weeks it still hurt. It's amazing the attachment that you can feel so quickly to something so small.

I felt really good going into this pregnancy. I was the healthiest that I've been yet for any of my pregnancies and was feeling really positive about the whole thing. But at an early ultrasound things didn't look so promising and I did my best to stay positive until getting blood results but yet again. Bad news. I left the hospital heartbroken one more time.

How could this be happening again? I felt so good about things? What is wrong with me?

These are some of the questions that I found myself pondering. Most of all I felt broken and there was nothing I could do to fix it. And so far, nothing the doctors can figure out.

How do you move on from that? I am still not really sure but some how I manage to get up and keep moving everyday.

Struggles

In our lives we go through struggles of all types.

My biggest struggle has been starting a family with my husband. In the two years that we have been married we have been pregnant 3 times and given birth to 2 children. First a daughter born at 23 weeks, then a son born at 21.5 weeks. They were born just under a year apart and both survived for only an hour to an hour and a half.

This blog is for them and for anyone else who has every struggled with bringing children into this world.